ok so it's almost september! and after that it's october! which is the month i'm running my first marathon ever! i mean i like signed up for it many many many months ago. i've been dreaming about doing this for years now. and the closer the day comes i get a little more anxious. it's weird. it's almost like i don't want it to happen because there's something exciting about just having the dream. i'm sorta kinda afraid of what the reality of it will do to the fantasy of it. and i kind of like saying i'm gonna do a marathon. the idea of actually really doing it, still scares the crap out of me.
i still have my 16, 18 and 20 mile training runs to get through, so without having done those i can't really fear whether or not i will finish. my confidence come race day will depend heavily on how those training runs go. but part of me also wonders how in the world is doing one 20 mile training run enough to prepare me for 26.2!!! that's a whole 10k longer than my longest training run?! and isn't 20 miles where people hit "the wall"?! who the hell thought up my stupid training schedule and thought it was gonna be enough!?
so far in all of my long runs, i've never had to use the bathroom. #1 or #2. but i'm afraid my bowels will decide to go into overdrive come race day. or i'll be all hopped up on hormones from my period that i'll be bloated, cranky, and tired. during training i usually give myself a break during that time of the month but what if marathon day just happens to fall during that time of the month!?! ugh. i'm no longer on birth control so messing around with my cycle is out of the question, but the guilty catholic in me fears god's wrath for having used it in the past. not so much for the pre-marital sex mind you, but the use of artificial birth control. and if that whole paragraph was t.m.i., sorry.
another fear i have is that i'll run out of bodyglide. that my legs will chafe down to the bone. i mean really, can bodyglide really last an entire 5 plus hour marathon?? and not only run out of body glide but can my body really handle running on gu for 5 plus hours?! i've run for 3 hours on gu and done fine, but can i last for nearly double that time on just gu alone?
i really want to enjoy this experience, but part of me just wishes this was over with already. i'd like to resume a normal life where i don't have to worry about stuff like this!
13 comments:
bless your heart I hope just by getting it off your chest you are feeing a little bit better... i think it's completely 100% normal and understandable but don't allow it to overwhelm you, feel those feels and then just keep on livin' and runnin' and all will fall into place nicely. You are doing so beautifully during this training and all you can do is your best under the circumstance even if the circumstance turns out to be "that time of the month". You're awesome girl!
All your fears are completely normal. First, does it make sense to run a marathon before a marathon? No, if you run more than 20 miles/4 hours close to the race, your body may not recover in time. That's why there's a mileage/time cut off. Second, this is a race for women -- there should be plenty of portable toilets along the route. And all med tents distributing Tylenol or ibuprofen or whatever also stock tampons and sanitary pads. I know this from ample experience. Work hard on running marathon pace for those big three runs. That will instill all the confidence you need.
I get worried too, and I've run a marathon before! And I too, am ready to be done with it so I can resume a normal life without it looming over me. So, I'm on the same page you are!
But as per the worries, most of those will be solved by the race provider. Bathrooms are frequent. If you get your period, take some aspirin and head out. If you run out of body glide, some marathon stations will have some kind of lubricant or lotion to help you out. And as far as the 20? It will get you to where you need to be race day morning. You're not a pro marathoner, so any more than that and you wear youself out for the big show. Don't worry, it'll be enough.
Pre race nerves would be something that most of us experience.
Maybe you could adopt the strategy you used in the last mile of the 5k race (great race btw) just keep telling yourself that you feel good no matter how tough it gets.
(I feel a long comment coming on...)
I'm not sure what about your fears are irrational, they seem totally normal to me. I'm sure I thought about all these scenarios during my last taper...I can't speak for other people, I know that I go through a very similar ebb and flow pattern. Training is a long and sometimes painful process - the whole time you need to think about this far off day, but if you only think about that far off day the training sucks the life out of you.
Will you finish, of course you will. Though I don't follow rules well, I know why they say you shouldn't have a time goal for a 1st marathon. To have a great race everything needs to go right, but to have a so-so race only one or two things need to go wrong. Doing a 20 miler prepares your body for the time out on the course and there will be supporters cheering the whole way to get you through the last 10K. I know a few great marathoners and none of them do more than 22 at most, rarely at true marathon pace, and they all have great PRs, so it is totally reasonable.
There is no book and there are no training schedules for how to get your brain to go along with what you are pushing your body to do - somehow it just happens. When you finish, no matter what the clock says, I hope you are elated and feel that all the stress and the sacrifices were worth it.
I have to agree with everyone who has commented so far. If you have to go during the race, you will just have to go. Whatever happens, you will deal with it because of all the hard work you have put into getting to that day. I know it will be awesome, no matter what.
As far as the 20-miler goes, it's enough because it just is. The cheering crowds, the other runners and sheer determination because you are oh-so-close will get you through the rest.
Seriously, it's gonna be awesome.
I wish I had some advice to give you or some experience to share with you to make you feel better. I think it's good you posted your questions/concerns b/c you seem to be getting a lot of great insight from knowledgable people.
Do you remember your first 5K? You were probably nervous for that too right? You've got jitters b/c it's the "unknown" but you've been preparing for a while and you're going to do awesome. Keep reminding yourself of that.
KelsaLynn
A couple things:
You are going to have a blast and be on a high for months to come after the race.
A 20-miler is plenty. I've done 4 marathons, and the longest run I did during any of my training was 22. Read www.runnersworld.com - they address this somewhere on their site - the dispute over how long the longest run should be.
Body Glide might not last that long. They sell super little ones, so that's an idea. And these things called Amphipods are great for carrying stuff like that. Sometimes people are along the route with Vaseline-covered pieces of cardboard that you can just swipe a chunk of Vaseline from, too.
You should definitely try to see over the remaining days before your race what sets off your bowels before a run. I'm serious. Chart it if you have to. I've never pooped during a marathon, thank god.
Peeing is another story. Email me, and I'll tell you my surefire strategy for not peeing during the entire 5 hours.
You're gonna rock!
This may be hard to do, but I advise to relax on race day and enjoy your first marathon. Remember, no matter how fast or slow you run, you'll PR!
WOW - I don't know if I could handle this.
You're going to do great - just believe in yourself.
(pack a little extra glide on those thighs, just in case) :)
I'm sure all of this has already been said, but let me put my 2 cents in.
Bathrooms will be a plenty on the course. But, I never had to use one (lucky me), or unlucky because my pee was the color of a penny by the time it was over.
Bodyglide: I only applied once while I was getting dressed and my thighs didn't start any fires. Besides that all of the aid stations will have vasoline which will work in a pinch.
I was told when I asked the "only 20 miles" question that if you run past 20 miles you will get discouraged because you will know what it's like to hit the wall. Sounded good to me. My best miles were 17-20. I got this second wind and thought that whole "wall" thing was B.S. At 20, I ate some clif blocs (which I had never tried) and all of a sudden got this weird out of body feeling that lasted for about 2 miles. I'm guessing that was the wall, but I slowed down, got my wind back and by mile 22 I knew I was home free.
And gu? Take some extra packs. I gued every hour during San Diego and that may have contributed to my not-ever-feeling-down-feeling.
And finally. Girl, you're gonna rock it! When I started to get scared, I just told myself "all I have to do is finish."
That sounds exactly like what I was thinking about a month before my first marathon last year. I was freaking out.
But yes the body can survive on Gu for five plus hours. And somehow my body glide miraculously lasted as well.
By the end of training, I always want to get back to "normal" life. But then I gotta ask myself is my life "normal" without running. Usually the answer's no.
You'll do awesome in your race. That little bit of nervous energy is sometimes just what you need to perform at your best!
i am the queen of irrational fears & so i totally know where you are coming from & i was so in this exact place last year in the month before my first marathon too. i vascillated between being so excited & wanting to hyperventilate into a paper bag the anxiety was so palpable. so, here's what i have to offer:
my marathon day did fall on the first day of that time of month. natch. not a big deal at all.
20 miles is a perfect long run before marathon - any longer & you won't have time to recover (i think someone said that) ... my coach had me do a 21 miler instaed of 20 - just to get over that number 20 though, it was more for my head than my body.
as far as #2 ... i had major concerns about this as well - i was having issues during training & was in a panic about marathon day. immodium ad became my best friend on long runs ... but i am just saying what worked for me ... i wouldn't recommend it unless you try it out in training first! but if #2 is not an issue during training, then don't worry about it.
mostly, your goal for a first marathon should just be to finish & finish happy - no matter how long it takes. if you've been following your training plan you are totally ready ... the adrenaline & excitement will carry you the rest of the way. its' one of the most amazing days i've ever had in my life - i hope its the same for you!!
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