i was too crushed and concerned with my health that i didn't get to write about anything else about the race.
the day was PERFECT for running and it was very well organized. plenty of clean portopotties (well clean for portopotties), lots of shady and sunny areas for runners to stretch and relax. i was just super super excited about starting and being "in it". i got so antsy in my corral, impatience, excitement, pride, joy all swelling up inside me. i just couldn't believe that 6 months had finally flown by and it was time to race.
i thought about how i had started, back in the winter, trudging out of my house after work in the dark and cold to get on a treadmill, only to have it defeat me after half a mile. i thought about where my head and heart was at the time. i thought about how difficult it was to get me to the gym to run, for even half an hour. and here i was about to run for over 2 hours!
i thought about all that had happened in my personal life in the past 6 months. how far i thought i had slipped back, but really how far i had come. i thought about how strong running had made me. i thought about how much it taught me, about taking things one day at a time. about celebrating the small victories. about how far one can go with just some training and some time.
and during my race there were so many times i just thought i would burst into tears, not just from pain, but in the beginning from the sheer joy and pride of running, with sooo many other people. so many others had stories behind the race. some proudly displayed who they were running in memory of, what school or charity they were running for. to me it's just so inspiring to see so many others inspired to lace up.
and while this race was "the" race, what running has taught me is that there is no finish line. enjoy each run, enjoy each race. there is no destination but today. and for someone as future and goal oriented as i am, that's a hard but refreshing lesson to learn.
i'm surprised i wasn't more crushed than i was. it helped that my friends were impressed that i finished. and after thinking about it, i finished only 20 minutes later than my expected time, even with my body crapping out on me. and the fact that i finished at all, especially considering how much pain i was in, is seriously a testament to the size of my cajones. i not only finished a hard race, i finished it under very adverse conditions. go me. :)
there will be plenty of races in my future. and i think i got everything i wanted and more from training for this one.
on a health note, i went to the ER monday night after work because i still had a terrible headache, a little dizziness and i wasn't peeing nearly as much as i thought i should, even though when i did it was clear.
i was in the ER the entire night! from around 6 to 11:30! in that time, i was given 2L of iv fluids, peed in a cup, got a cat scan, listened to a belligerent old man in the room next to me complain about a pain in his back and a softball sized growth on his stomach, was attended to by a cute male nurse with a nice butt and got about 70 pages into my new book.
all they could conclude was that i had sinusitus. which explained the headache etc, but not my body failure during the race. there was no evidence of dehydration or renal failure. i'm chalking my body ills on race day up to the extreme amounts of loratadine, pseudoephedrine, and naisds i had the week and day before. the week leading up to the race was honestly abysmal, but i had no choice to run because well the race was scheduled. but i'm looking for new allergy options and in the meantime have 10 days of antibiotics to get through.
i'm not sore at all, which is surprising, but nice. so a short run tonight is in order.
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