motivation

getting dressed for work in the morning has been such a pain in the ass the past year. my weight slowly but surely crept up and i was down to 1 pair of black slacks, 1 pair of grey slacks with one pant leg longer than the other (one of the hems fell), and 1 pair of long taupe slacks that i've been hemming with tape. a few months ago, the friction of my thighs had worn a hole in the only pair of jeans i fit into. so i bought a bigger pair (sigh). i've supplemented this atrocious line up with leggings (!!!) worn with tunics and such.

needless to say, i've been a hot mess.

but i've noticed in the last few weeks that my pants have been getting too big. and not just the ones that i bought a little bit big to begin with. every current pair of slacks that i've worn to get me through the year is too big.

huzzah!

i unearthed a couple pairs of smaller pants, but for the most part they all need hemming too. i never wanted to invest in professionally hemming a pair of pants in a size i didn't want to be in for very long. hence the ghetto tape.

but lately, i've been dressing up my leggings 'cause they're the only things that fit. and today they fit even better. no muffin top! i could wear them with a silky top that skimmed my redefined curves and whoa! stopped patrick in his tracks. he gushed and leered and blathered helplessly.

felt. frickin'. awesome.

though it was a little ridiculous because when i met him i was 15 pounds lighter than i am now. i guess it's just been awhile since i've felt any confidence in my body.

i felt really powerful.

i've lost 13.5 in the last 6 weeks. and i am strongly resisting the urge to not feel happy until i lose it all. so yes, i am still obese, but i'm still workin' it! :)